| What Happens |
Points He
Gives Her |
|
| 1. He makes a mistake and she doesn't say "I told you so" or offer advice. |
10-20 |
|
| 2. He disappoints her and she doesn't punish him. |
10-20 |
|
| 3. He gets lost while driving and she doesn’t make a big deal out of it. |
10-20 |
|
| 4. He gets lost and she sees the good in the situation and says "We would never have seen this beautiful sunset if we had taken the most direct route." |
20-30 |
|
| 5. He forgets to pick up something and she says "It's OK. Would you do it next time you are out?" |
10-20 |
|
| 6. He forgets to pick up something again and she says with trusting patience and persistence. "It's OK. Would you still get it?" |
20-30 |
|
| 7. When she has hurt him and she understands his hurt, she apologizes and gives him the love he needs. |
10-40 |
|
| 8. She asks for his support and he says no and she is not hurt by his rejection but trusts that he would if he could. She does not reject him or disapprove of him. |
10-20 |
|
| 9. Another time she asks for his support and he again says no. She does not make him feel wrong but accepts his limitations at that time. |
20-30 |
|
| 10. She asks for his support without being demanding. |
1-5 |
|
| 11. She asks for support without being demanding when she is upset or he knows she has been giving more. |
10-30 |
|
| 12. When he withdraws, she doesn't make him feel guilty. |
10-20 |
|
| 13. When he comes back from his cave she welcomes him and doesn't punish him or reject him. |
10-20 |
|
| 14. When he apologizes for a mistake and she receives it with loving acceptance and forgiveness. The bigger the mistake he makes, the more points he gives. |
10-50 |
|
| 15. When he asks her to do something and she says no without giving a list of reasons why she can't do it. |
1-10 |
|
| 16. When he asks her to do something and she says yes and stays in a good mood. |
1-10 |
|
| 17. When he wants to make up after a fight and starts doing little things for her and she starts appreciating him again. |
10-30 |
|
| 18. She is happy to see him when he gets home. |
10-20 |
|
| 19. She feels disapproving and, instead of expressing it, she goes in another room and privately centers herself and then comes back with a more centered and loving heart. |
10-20 |
|
| 20. On special occasions, she overlooks his mistakes that might normally upset her. |
20-40 |
|
| 21. She really enjoys having sex with him. |
10-40 |
|
| 22. He forgets where he put his keys and she doesn't look at him disapprovingly as though he was irresponsible. |
10-20 |
|
| 23. She is tactful or graceful in expressing her dislike or disappointment about a restaurant or movie when on a date. |
10-20 |
|
| 24. She doesn’t give advice when he is driving or parking the car and then appreciates him for getting them there. |
10-20 |
|
| 25. She asks for his support rather than dwelling on what he has done wrong. |
10-20 |
|
| 26. She shares her negative feelings in a centered way without blaming, rejecting, or being disapproving of him. |
10-40 |
|
